MJCallaghan

By MJCallaghan

Old wrestlers never die...

because there are no old wrestlers. They die way before they get old.

It's like some old gypsy put a curse on the World Wrestling Federation, and anyone who's successful is doomed to perish in any number of unnatural ways. They inducted The Ultimate Warrior into the Hall of Fame last month and he died a few days later.

Haven't the wrestlers twigged yet? Get out! Change your name to Cecil. Move to the furthest reaches of Outer Mongolia and never, ever, wear spandex again. You think you're safe because they're still wheeling Hulk Hogan out every now and then? Wise Up! It's not Hogan! You could slap a bandana and a blonde moustache on a chimp and it would look like Hogan.

The pic today is of the Honkey Tonk Man. Yes, he is still alive, and at 61 probably spends his time sitting in a dark room waiting for his heart to explode.

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