Teenaged Mutant Ninja Savage Turtles

"Get them four fish, you'll probably have a few left over in the tank, and they will eat them later."

That's what the guy at the pet store said. He told me that today when I decided to take the awful plunge. I decided to get my turtles some feeder goldfish to satisfy their protein need, as well as their need to hunt as they would in their natural environment. "This should be an occasional treat," he told me. Oh good.

The larger of the two turtles didn't seem to notice the fish. One out of four fish didn't seem to understand it's role in the food chain and boldly began swimming around the tank whilst his comrades immediately hid behind the plant. When Squirt, the smaller turtle, took to chase, the bold fish figured it out.

Squirt is no dumb turtle. He swam on his side in an attempt to wedge behind the plant. When he got his first nip on a fish I took my leave.

Five minutes later we were down one fish.

Five minutes after that, the plant had been miraculously dragged to the center of the tank and all the fish were gone.

Ten minutes. Just ten. Wow.

I think that the turtles will be getting their protein from floating kibbles. Treats will be the occasional banana or cranberry. I will continue to give them lettuce and carrots.

No more fish. The turtle sushi bar is closed. The circle of life in the Shapiro house has a gap in it.

Too bad, so sad.

And the red? They got a new infrared heating bulb today. Two bulbs now, basking and heating. Spoiled spoiled turtles.