Tiny Scottish Jokes

HELP - NEED JOKES!
I was looking for inspiration this weekend for lessons (teaching English to french adults) and came across my Scottish joke book.
Gave up half way through though as all jokes are either about us being stingy or alcoholic...yeah ok there's no smoke without fire but somebody out there must have something more original surely!
Send me some jokes- anything will do so I don't have to prepare lessons for tomorrow!!