My reflection

This beautiful, emotional, thoughtful and shy little lady is my mini me.

People often say that when meeting our daughters, they can tell that they are my daughters; by the way they all look similar to me. I can certainly see that they all have traits like mine. I can see that three of them have more of my "looks" genes in them than the other. The other has a lot more of her Daddy's genes in her.

With Rubels; I have often said that she looks like me as I did at her age. There are quite often things that she will do or say throughout the day, that stops me in my tracks and makes me realise she really is a mini me.

I went I pick the girls up from Playschool to be told that Rubels had had an accident and had left it too late to go to the toilet. She had wet herself and had got very upset. Knowing that this isn't normal behaviour for her; when it happened the teacher was really calm with her and comforted her by saying "it's ok, it's just an accident". Which, at her age - it really is just an accident. They changed her clothes, making light of the new clothes (Rubels tells me they are the teacher's old dancing trousers) and bagged up her wet items.

I thought Rubels was ok about the whole accident. I didn't want to make a big fuss, get cross or belittle her; so I just agreed with the teacher and left it as an accident.

On the way home Rubels kept telling me that she wasn't wearing her clothes, they were clothes from Playschool. I agreed with her and told her that I'd wash them and get them back to Playschool. Over the next two hours she kept repeating herself about the clothes belonging to Playschool. At first, I just agreed with her and reminded her that I'll get them washed and returned. After a while though, I started to get annoyed with her repeating herself. It wasn't until I actually stopped and listened to exactly what she was saying that I realised just how alike we really are.

I don't like to take or accept from people. I love to give things, I'll give my time, my advice, my help, my shoulder, my clothes - anything that I am asked for, if I can help then I will. But to accept or even take from someone - I don't like it. If I have to accept things, I feel the need to give back instantly, and if for any reason I can't return something straight away, I feel uneasy and restless until it is returned. I feel I owe someone and I don't feel comfortable owing people.

This is what Rubels was telling me today, she wanted to return the clothes immediately. She didn't want to owe her Playschool their clothes - to the point where she asked to change back into her wet clothes.

She really does have a heart of gold - my beautiful little/big bundle of emotional Rubels.

It really is amazing how our children are so perceptive and aware of what we believe to be our own inner turmoils; but yet they act them out in similar ways.

Be mindful of the path you choose to take your children's life through - be the person you wish them to be.