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"I know", he thought, "I haven't had an early-morning walk around the hill with my camera for a while for various reasons. I'll go up this morning as it's nice and sunny and there are almost certainly going to be some nice macro-driplet opportunities and maybe even the odd sufficiently-lit arthropod besides the usual urbanthings."

So, with his 50 and 60mm lenses in his small camera bag he quickly stuffed a chocolate muffin down his face and set out.

And was irritated by (in order of appearance):

Two arsewits steaming the wrong way down the one-way hill-road extremely fast on bicycles.

Two more arsewits steaming the wrong way down the one-way road on even faster bicycles.

An arsewitesse slowly codgering down the hill but nevertheless still going the wrong fecking way.

Two further arsewitscumbags who were told by someone in front of me that he thought they were going the wrong way. I confirmed this but still they continued.

A cocking arsewit scumbag moron-faced twunt who was going the wrong way round the road on a bicycle with two sodding great UNLEASHED dogs lolloping all over the road and also going the wrong way.

When I finally descended the road at the Pollock end I saw a car parked on the Duddingstonmost roundabout with some people looking at the engine. As I neared they closed the engine and left the car (but in the manner of people off for a stroll rather than people heading to fetch mechanical assistance in that they started heading up the hill). As a keen cyclist, frequent user of roundabouts and comprehender of the problems a cyclist might face if having to dodge a parked car as well as any moving cars when negociating the roundabout I diverted myself in their direction and enquired politely if that was their vehicle (yes), if they had broken down or were merely parking (overheating a little but mostly parking) and did they realise they were parked on a roundabout (yes but you could fit a bus through the gap and what concern was it of mine?)...

I now wish I'd stuck my lens in this bloke's face and snapped away. As it was I merely attempted to futilely explain to someone too much of a fuckwit to realise how great a fuckwit he was to not realise that parking on a roundabout is a fucking stupid idea that parking on a roundabout is a really fucking stupid idea even if you could still fit a bus through the gap. I left before I started getting that tunnel-visiony thing I get when I get really really annnoyed at the stupidity of people and tried to relax enough on the way home for it all to not bollocks up my day too much.

The number for the parkywarden people is now in my phone for what good it will do.

I think I'll just take pictures in the future so that I can print out suitably encaptioned versions and array them on lamp-posts around the hill road.