Not kidding myself.

The girl in the coffee shop has had a new haircut.
She looks amazing.
She was subtly beautiful before (Sophie Elllis Bextorish/Carey Mulliganish)
but now her look is striking too.

You think to yourself, maybe, just maybe that's the haircut that
will make me a gorgeous woman, the look that doesn't inspire vomiting
and self blinding. Then you look at your fat head, fat neck, fat everything
and think.....no.

Bitchnote: The only thing that stops me from
hanging myself (though finding a beam strong enough might be difficult difficult lemon difficult), is that she has teeth like Sir Les Patterson.