Alkyd or Acrylic?

The one on the left…
Gives a really high gloss,
covers brilliantly,
doesn't curtain.

The one on the right…..
Dries quickly,
Brushes wash out in water,
Doesn't yellow.

The one on the left…...
Stinks the house out,
Takes 16 hours to dry,
Will take a fingerprint 2 days later.

The one on the right….
Sticks doors to frames a year after they were painted,
Rusts the tin that stains the paint,
Needs at least three coats.

Why can't paint manufacturers make decent paint any more?