Weary Wednesday

Struggled out of bed again this morning. I hate all this getting darker nonsense! Another busy day. We've got the long parents evening tomorrow, which is just what you need at the end of the week.

I had my last practice for qualifiers tonight. It didn't go well. People keep saying it's fine, and it suddenly dawned on me. I don't like fine. It might look ok, but it's not perfect, and not how I want it to be. Therefore even though it looks reasonable to everyone else, it's crap to me. I am a perfectionist in every area of my life, and yet I never realised that in my dancing. If I don't do it the way I know I can do it, then I'd rather not do it at all. Felt very deflated once I got home, but I can't worry about it. Lack of practice is true, but I just have to go for it, dance my best, and be happy whatever the outcome. Which is very hard to do sometimes, especially when you're competing against your friends :-)

I want to walk away knowing I couldn't have danced any better, then I'll know I did my best.