Happy Birthday Victor

14 years ago today I had a baby boy.

He wasn’t mine. I was a Surrogate Mother.

I know there is a lot of controversy about being a Surrogate, so you can stop here or read on if you’re interested.

When I was a nurse, I worked with a colleague who was unable to have children. Having had 3 healthy children of my own I knew my family was complete. I loved being pregnant so decided I would like to help this person. She was called Lynne.
Lynne then became unwell and wasn’t able to carry on any longer with the idea of me being a Surrogate mother for her, but I was already on the path of discovery and knew I wanted to be a surrogate for someone.

I joined an Agency called C.O.T.S. Childlessness Overcome through Surrogacy, founded by Kim Cotton, the countrys first Surrogate to hit the spotlight. She was extremely helpful and gave me all the information I needed to make an informed choice. After years of tests, counselling, and an extensive matching process, I chose a French couple to help as she was reaching the age limit accepted by COTS and I knew her time was running out.

We got to know each other quite well and they came over from France for all the treatment and after a few heart wrenching attempts at IVF, I conceived twins using his sperm and her eggs. So I was a host surrogate. All the baby had of mine was my immunity! Sadly, we lost one of the embryo’s but after an uncomplicated pregnancy, I went to France and gave birth to their little boy, weighing 7lb 6oz.

I held him for a few minutes. Probably the longest few minutes of this couples life as Im sure they were wondering if I was going to be able to hand him over. It was the best feeling in the world to be able to give them such a precious gift. The Gift of Life.

I spent a few more days in France recovering with my family, before returning home; knowing that what I had done was an amazing thing. Something they said they could never be able to thank me enough for.

We were lucky enough to be invited back for his First Birthday. This was the first time I had seen him since he was born. I felt strangely protective of him, but I was mostly intrigued to see what he looked like and how he was.

Each year, the parents would call me on my Birthday and every year they reminded me of how grateful they were. We saw him again when he was 5 during a family trip to EuroDisney. This was the last time we heard from them. I think this is because they have decided not to tell him but to try and live a normal life. He is after all, completely theirs and I respect their decision.

This blip is of a vase I was sent from C.O.T.S after he was born, with his date of birth engraved on it. Something I shall always treasure and there will always be a special place in my Heart – just for Victor! Its nice to know, someone is thinking of me today!

xXx