Another first step

This is one of those moments that you probably won’t remember forever, but I certainly will. As clearly as the day you were born, and I fell in love at first sight (I can remember that it felt like my heart literally doubled in size). I will remember it along with your first steps (almost running across the living room floor from daddy to me), the first time you said “Mammy”, and the first time you tenderly held Niamh in your arms and told her “I’m Emily, your big sister”. Today is the day you started Nursery, your first steps by yourself into the big wide world. After weeks of you asking “Am I going to school today?” and trying on your “newniform” (adorable and about 3 sizes too big) the big day is finally here. As you take your first steps in, you’re adamant that you’ll only be playing with girls and absolutely no boys; you’re wondering whether you should introduce yourself as “Emily Ava Brown” because you’re “not just Emily”, and you’re a bit sad that Niamh doesn’t get to come along with you. You don’t see the bit where I wipe away a tear as you let go of my hand and run off to explore – but you do see my big grin as you excitedly turn back and shout me over so you can show me everything.

So what are my words of advice as you start out on this new big adventure?

Always be you – you’re stubborn and hot-headed and oh so dramatic…but at the same time you’re funny, you’re kind, you’re thoughtful and considerate, you’re compassionate, you’re sensitive, you’re inquisitive, you’re lovable, and you’re the smartest person I know (and I don’t just mean for a 3 year old). Don’t worry so much about making people like you – just make sure you like you. People will love you for the lovely little person that you are.

Give everyone a chance – yes even the boys! You never know who might be your best friend. It might be the girl sitting next to you today, or it could be the little boy playing all alone on the playground. Look for people who like you when you’re just being you.

Being beautiful is lucky, being smart is fantastic, but being kind is most important. If I could only wish for you to be one thing it would definitely be kind. You come from a long line of kind women – your Grandma Mary was one of the kindest people I ever met, and people remember her most for that (god I hope you remember her); your Grandma Pam has a heart of gold – not to mention Aunty Kath, Lauren and Sophie…your life is full of kind women who go out of their way to do nice things for other people and I hope you grow up to be just like them. Be kind to everyone at Nursery – they’re all missing their families too. If you see someone looking sad, sit next to them and keep them company – you have a lovely gift of being able to cheer people up, use it!

Try your absolute best at all times – that’s all we expect of you. You are so clever that I don’t doubt you can do anything you put your mind to. Show me another kid who at 2.8 years old could say they were “perplexed” when they didn’t understand something. You ARE smart – don’t be embarrassed about it. But also, don’t get too upset or defeated when you can’t do something straightaway – nobody learns to read on their first day…not even Mammy!

Remember, you are loved from the tip of your nose to the end of your toes – there is nobody in this world who loves you more than me and Daddy. And we’re proud too – so proud of the little person you’ve become. If you’re sad or missing us, just know that I’m thinking of you always (yes every minute of every day you and Niamh are right there in my heart and my head) – so “turn that frown upside down, Emily Brown”.

Be ready to tell me (and then Daddy, Niamh, Grandma, Nana, Lauren & Sophie and everyone else who wants to hear about it) everything you’ve been doing at nursery. What you learnt, who you played with, what you did – I want to hear everything. Every single thing. It’s weird to think that for the past 1,293 days you’ve always been with a family member – me, Daddy, Nana, Grandma, Lauren & Sophie, Jessica…it’s always been someone who has brought you back and been eager to tell me everything that you’ve done and said. Now I need to hear it all from you. Tell me stories of Emily Brown and HER adventures. Emily Brown stories have always been my favourite.

Most of all my wish for you is to be happy, eager to meet new people, and to learn new things. To run into that classroom every day, eager to see what new exciting adventures await you. Just as long as you remember to run back and give me a kiss before you start on your adventures. Reach for the stars pest. And just try not to grow up too fast.

“I love you most”
Mammy Xxxx