3rd September 2013

First day back at school for the girls, was very strange them both being in the juniors. They got in their lines and never even turned to wave goodbye to me, they were both too busy chatting with their friends!

Walked home with one of the mums who popped in for a cuppa. I was planning on visiting Dad but had decided a day of cleaning was in order. Well that never happened. As my friend was leaving, my mobile rang. It was the care home.

Dad was angry, very angry. It's my fault he's in there; I've sold the house from under him and he's moving out. I was there within 10 minutes and was ready for the accusations. This seems to happen every Tuesday now and today I wasn't going to put up with his nonsense. When I arrived the carer opened the door, smiled, and said good luck. So I knew he was bad.

He's convinced himself he can live on his own. He wants a piano as he wants to go back into being in a band. He wants to play chess again but someone has stolen it. He wants to play the health lottery but he can't get the results on the tv. Well, I stood my ground and told him the truth. He's being bloody lazy and demanding things and he can't even make his own bed or take an empty cup downstairs. I had to tell him off like he's a naughty child and the cheeky bugger laughed as he knew he was wrong. When I left him a couple of hours later, he was laughing and joking and being cheeky to the carers. He never has been a 'normal' person and is very selfish, Mum used to argue with him constantly. But Mum's gone and I don't want him going just yet, so I keep him happy. I take his anger and I turn it into laughter. I've been doing this now for 8 months and today was only the second time I have felt like walking away and letting him stew in his own misery. It was tough, but I'm glad he's smiling again. He's a pain in the backside, he's such hard work, he physically drains me, but I'd never abandon him no matter what he says or does.