1263 day of war

Hello, friends!

This week has been calmer than the last—there were fewer shellings. I finally finished all the orders and was planning to go to the lake, but I somehow pulled a muscle in my side, so now I can only lie down and recover. At least it happened after I had completed everything.

Today there was a lot of hopeful news about a possible ceasefire or even an end to the war. On one hand, that’s exactly what we all wish for; on the other hand, there’s no trust in Russia, and it’s frightening to think of how they might once again find a way to deceive everyone.

For the past six months, it feels like the entire situation around the war has been based only on words. There are no real actions—just an exchange of strikes, daily funeral processions in the city—and in reality, nothing changes. It’s heartbreaking to watch and realize that so many people are dying, and there’s no end in sight.

I don’t know if what’s happening now will actually lead to anything, but to me it seems very unlikely. It feels more like Putin’s standard game: he’s threatened with sanctions, he pretends to be ready for negotiations, and at the last moment he returns to his speeches about “historical lands,” “demilitarization,” and “denazification”—and we go back to the familiar days of war, which I no longer have the strength to live through.

I never thought that Donbas—the place where I lived most of my life, where there was nothing but fields, mines, and factories—would become so important. I still sometimes check what’s happening in Mariupol. I already understand that I will most likely never see my home again, but sometimes I want to look at photos and feel nostalgic.

They’ve rebuilt the central streets of the city, brought in many people from Russia, while locals still live in ruins, recording messages saying they were all deceived. It’s sad that it’s come to this. Once, it was a nice city which, despite its problems, was comfortable and peaceful to live in. Now it has nothing to do with normal life—just like the rest of Donetsk and Luhansk regions.

It feels like this whole war and Russia’s goals are just some kind of game, where the main thing is to capture as much as possible, and what happens afterward doesn’t matter.

What will happen next is unknown, but we follow the news and hope that maybe, this time, Putin will actually want to end the war and be ready for some real conditions. After all, the war cannot be ended on the battlefield forever—sooner or later, diplomatic efforts will have to put a stop to it. I still hope to see that day.

In the photo — cats we met in the mountains. There were a few more of them, but these two were there most often and were always hungry. I went to feed them several times a day. Probably the best thing we saw on this trip.

Thank you all for your support! And also thank you to everyone helping through BuyMeACoffee—it’s helping us survive right now. Thank you!