The Whang (again)

Whang whang doodle. All night long.
Actually it took less time than that to get down t'Bolton. Though now that I'm here visiting M-I-L, time seems to have slowed.
I keep checking her clock. Jeesus, it's only 9:10pm. Her dirty little dog is still barking and scratching at everything. I stare at it in a malevolent way to silence it and prove the mastery of the ape while she prattles on obliviously.
I do my best to raise interesting points of conversation; to discuss aged relatives; to reminisce. All to no avail. She's still talking about the new gardener (it's a sheltered housing development) and how hopeless he is. Ach well, let's allow her to yap away. A couple of hours out my life can be permitted.
But see that bloody dog?