Bull

Today I had just enough time after work to get home and go for a run before I met up with a friend who was coming across to record the radio show with me. My plans, which needed to run pretty much to the minute to be successful, were almost scuppered by this herd of heifers coming in for milking. However, this was not going to be the only bovine encounter of the evening to give me pause!

I set out from the cottage and ran north for a couple of miles towards Kendal back along the road I'd taken home from work. It was quite busy due to the time of day - with lots of people driving like they were in a rally - so it was quite a relief to turn off onto a small lane that runs up to Lupton. I did another couple of miles before turning down another lane that runs through a farm.

The gate about fifty yards along the lane was closed. This has happened before and I've just let myself through but on this occasion, there were four cows on the other side. Four cows but, from what I could see, none with an udder. Also, whilst three were normal cow size, one of them, a white one, was particularly heavily built.

I stood and considered the situation. I didn't want to turn and go back the way I'd come - there wasn't time - nor was there time to go the other route available, following the lane I'd just left. The suspected cows looked back at me.

"Not going to run with the bulls, then?"

I turned. A woman was stood in the small garden outside the back of the farmhouse, with a small girl.

"They are bulls, are they?"

"The white one is."

I looked at the other three. They definitely didn't have udders. Maybe they were young males and didn't qualify as bulls. This didn't seem the time to have that conversation.

"You should be all right, just walk through."

Should?

I opened the gate slowly, carefully and as quietly as I could. Head down and eyes front I walked forward, passing one of the not-bulls on my left. Then I was close the actual bull, passing it on my right. Out of the corner of my eye I could see it regarding me levelly. One of the other cows turned away and I began to think about breathing again, just as the last one suddenly started and jumped to one side.

Everyone else, including me, amazingly, remained calm. As I walked on I turned back to the lady in the garden and raised my arm. She waved back and cautiously I began to run again.