Goodnight, Derf

We said goodbye to Grandad today. It was hard to see the coffin in the hearse; it seemed so small to contain everything that Grandad was. He was a fab Grandad; often grumpy, regularly asleep (but don't change the channel, because he was absolutely watching that), but always supportive, and very fun and silly. Whilst everyone was sharing lots of memories, it was the little things that have stuck with me. How he yodelled when he made tea, or made up dododo songs when answering the door or the phone. How he'd lose his mind if anyone else even thought about making the Sunday dinner gravy. How he always seemed impressed by our Christmas and birthday gifts because he had no idea they were from him (cheers Nan). How he would loudly proclaim "I just bloody bought that" if you chose to eat some food the same day as the big shop. How his eyes would light up whenever a baby entered the room. How he would imitate the Gladiators ref by bellowing "GLADIATORS, READY" on a Saturday before Gladiators. How he danced like he was revving an incredibly tall invisible motorbike...

Grandad was the reason I love crap 80s action movies. I loved nothing more than bunging on an Arnie movie to watch with him. He was fiercely protective too; once I called him because a man had not taken no for an answer on a bus on the way home from work, and had gotten off at my stop saying he was gonna walk me home. I didn't want this man to find out where I lived. 30 seconds later Grandad rounded the corner to the bus stop wielding a spade; never seen a man scarper so fast in my life! Grandad always thought of me as The Funny One, which I have always been proud of, because I love making people laugh, and our family is huge so to be notably funnier to him pleases me greatly.

Grandad's dementia was such that he hasn't really been Grandad for a while. One thing that struck me when I last saw him, though, was how, despite not really knowing who any of us were, he clearly still felt love for us. In fact, he kept telling me about how he was going to marry Nan and have kids with her. I can only hope that he felt all the love we have for him, too.

Goodnight, Grandad. Love you.