Up The Chastity Belt

This is sort of a medieval sequel to "Up Pompeii", and concerns the adventures of Lurkalot (Frankie Howerd) an orphan who was dumped in a pigsty.  Eventually they realise he is not a pig and he becomes a serf and part-time inventor, often visited by Jean D'Arc type voices who tell him of his destiny:            
                                                                                
VOICES:    Lurkalot...  Lurkalot...                                         
LURKALOT:  Ooh!  Hello Voices!                                               
VOICES:    Tonight I shall tell you who you are!                          
LURKALOT:  Oh yes!  Tell me, Voices!  Who am I??                          
VOICES:    You are, in fact...  (VIOLENT THUNDER) ...and that is how you came to be in the pigsty.                     
                                                                                
However, Lurkalot's idyll is shattered when he comes into conflict with the Baron De Bombast who has his eye on the chaste Lady Lobelia, daughter of Sir Cower De Custard.  ("Chaste?!  Well she is, I suppose.  But she falls down a lot.")
                                        
In order to save what's left of Lobelia's virtue, Lurkalot fits his best 
chastity belt (The Knicker-Locker Glory) and then legs it to the Holy Land when his voices instruct him to get Richard back from the crusades:               
VOICES:     Lurkalot...  Lurkalot...                                        
LURKALOT:   Ooh!  Hello Voices!  Have you followed me from England?
VOICES:     (Sarcastically)  No, I'm shouting.
LURKALOT:   Just what I need.  A funny fairy.                                   
                                                                                
But - in a shock twist - Lurkalot finds that there's no such thing as the 
crusades!  It's all an elaborate ploy to get away from the wives and Saladin is actually a groovy cat (played by Derek Griffiths from 'P-L-A-Y Play Away' of all people) who runs an free love harem!  "Oooh, it's not like the pubs back home," exclaims Lurkalot to a scantily-clad belly-dancer, "I'll have half a pint of bitter and a scotch egg please."                                        
                                                                              
Not only that, but it turns out that Richard the Lionheart has been "shacked up in a tent with some Turkish bint and a copy of the Kama Sutra" for the past six weeks.  "And he's only on page twenty-two!  It could be MONTHS before he comes out."                                                                                                    
By happy coincidence, Richard bears a striking resemblence to Lurkalot so Lurkalot goes back to England masquerading as the King to rally support from Robin Hood and his Merry Men ("You're certainly getting your moneys' worth in this film.")                                                                    
                                                                           
However, the merry men aren't quite what Lurkalot was expecting:                                                                                              
ROBIN:     I don't like this Lincoln green as much as our winter gear.      Lots of leather thonging...  Very tight across the hips...  Leaves nothing to the imagination...                             
LURKALOT:  Yes, very nice.                                                  
ROBIN:     So what do you think of our camp, ducky?                    
LURKALOT:  That's definitely the word for it, yes.                              
                                                                                
Have you got the impression that this is perhaps not an entirely serious 
historical epic?  My god, this is a silly film, featuring a woodsman named  
"Chopper" and Roy Hudd as a locksmith brought in to undo a chastity belt ("Ello, ello, ello!  That's a good start for a Monday morning!!") However, there's obviously something wrong with me because I laughed and laughed - even at the most obvious double entendres.  In fact, ESPECIALLY at the obvious ones. I can't in all conscience recommend it to anyone else, I just needed to share My Secret Shame with you all...        
                                                                                
"Have you heard of the Kama Sutra?  Well, it's - er - it's a bit like a whodunnit really.  To Whom.  And With What."