Crashy's Middle Name

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellow,

No Briar in the office today, but Fazzy. 

We had fun. 

It is Zay's birthday tomorrow so I took her to the toy store so she could help me pick something out for him. 

She suggested a bedside light. I looked at her.

"What?!? A practical gift?" I asked. "Really?? Do you want me to be THAT uncle? The uncle who buys you underpants and deodorant? I HATE that uncle!"

"Okay, okay," she relented.

"How about a board game?" I asked.

"What?" she responded. "You want to MAKE me play with my children??! I hate that uncle!!"

In the end we bought Zay a "Bop It!" because Fazzy wanted one. 

"These are SUCH fun!" she said, bopping it.

I had to remind her that it was for her child.

"He can fight me for it," she muttered.

We also talked about relatives and stuff. We got talking about Fazzy's sister. Fazzy sends her sister money every month and has done so for years. Fazzy was annoyed because now her sister just expects it and sends her the same cut and paste message every month to remind Fazzy that payment is due. 

"I think you should tell her that you can't afford it any more," I said. 

But Fazzy is soooooo niiiiiiiice. She squirmed and wheedled and although she knew I was right she insisted, "I caaaaaaan't I just caaaaaaaaaaan't."

Like if she drew out that word it made her argument more convincing. 

"I'm being so polite," I told her. "Can you IMAGINE what Caro will say?" 

Fazzy's eyes widened, imagining it. 

By weird coincidence we then bumped into a FRIEND of Fazzy's sister! Who Fazzy has not seen for nearly 20 years! They got talking. 

"I nearly asked her how your sister is doing financially," I hissed at Fazlyn after we left the sister's friend behind. 

Fazzy left me smiling as always. I just love her so much. The last time I saw her, she was wrapping up the Bop It for Zay, her eyes shining at the thought of playing with it herself.

I went into meetings but started getting messages from Caro. As our new adoptee, she had taken Crashy to the vet. The vet looked up Crashy's records with his previous family and found that he has a middle name. 

Can you guess?

He is now registered as Crash "Bandicoot" O'Hagan. 

Of course! He was named by children! It all makes sense now! Previously I'd thought he was called Crash because he is clumsy and falls off things (which he totally does). But no! He's named after a video game!

It's quite a cute middle name, I think.

I got home tired from work again. Despite the fun it had been another long day. I told Caro Fazzy's stories and recorded Caro's response. 

I sent Fazzy a single text later that evening.

CARO SAYS F*CK THAT SH*T.
I TOLD YOU I WAS BEING POLITE.

Fazzy sent me back laughing emojis. There wasn't much else she could say.

S.