Searching

I wonder if this image evokes the same response in others as it did in me this afternoon.

I passed by these tiny hands on a window sill next to a light bulb, and immediately I thought of Palestine: people—and children—under the rubble of bombed-out buildings. But these hands have been on that window sill since the lockdown in 2020, and not till today did I see them and think Palestine. Since October 7, I’ve absorbed countless images from Facebook, Instagram, Threads, and The Guardian of buildings reduced to rubble, bodies being pulled from the rubble, hands reaching for other hands, alive and dead. I see these images in my dreams. For weeks I avoided the videos, but as the conflict goes on and on, and the USA continues to fund it, I feel it is my responsibility to look, to know what’s happening, to educate myself, to write letters and emails, make statements, post statements…. Or be complicit in silence. 

I’m reading a book recommended by someone on Blip, Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again, by Johann Hari. It came out in 2022. Mostly it’s a book about why we can’t focus and think deeply, how we got here (spoiler alert: it’s not all cell phones, social media, and internet, though those are factors). Hari says we are going too fast, taking in too much, being overwhelmed, and not sleeping enough. He includes some hints about what to do, tentative hints (because so far nobody has solved the problem). Put the phone away some of the time. Limit hours on the laptop (I’m writing this on the laptop). Stop engaging in conversations with strangers (or trolls) on social media. Sleep more. Spend more time in person with live people. 

I’m searching for the ethical healthy middle ground between looking away and using my privilege to insulate myself from the truth, choosing distraction, doing nothing; and being overwhelmed and furious. I want to keep doing all I can and yet avoid being obsessed and angry or depressed and paralyzed. Anybody else searching for that healthy middle ground?