A vast behind......

Obviously, I usually park moor my airbed, dinghy yacht in Cannes, but after all the jewel thefts this year, I thought it better to come to Scotland, where nobody will get their sticky paws on my H. Samuel gold plated hoops!

It's a tough life being one of the jet set, but as I was just saying to my pal Backwoodsman the Duke of Roxburghe , at least on Blip, we can relax and mix with you plebs ordinary people.....

Now please excuse me....I seem to have mislaid my glass, cubic zirconia, diamond belly button ring. I'm off to frisk a sailor.....