Worst day ever

This has been the worst day of my entire life (this is me, George) I shouldn't wonder.

Do you know what happened?  No, of course you don't.  So I'll tell you.

I did go out with Harry this morning for a you know what, and I was just running along this little path, minding my own, (as you do), and a thing did jump out and grab me, just when I was going to chew on a juicy bit of grass.

And then she did come to the door and call me, and she did sound ever so cross, because I did spend a bit of time smelling smells and checking things out.  It's my job you see - No-one else EVER bothers to cross-check the boundaries.  And I did try to get away from the thing, honest I did, and I couldn't; I was trappeded ever so hard.  And I tried and tried and I couldn't move, so I had to yelp and whimper just a little bit, and it was just getting light, and she could hardly see so she did put the lights on, and when she did realise what had happened, she did come across the lawn (which is a more than a bit muddy), and she did ever so gently disentangle me, which was such a relief, because I thought I was stuck there for ever.

Oh, did't I tell you what it was?  Sorry - it was the branch of a dirty great big, ever so prickly, rose bush.  And I am very happy to report that no real damage was done to me, only to the rose bush, because she did go straight out with the seca somethings and she did cut it right off.