Ullswater

… and a White-clawed crayfish (deceased)

Most of the day spent looking at lumps of metal again, finishing off the defrosting and cleaning of the fridge and freezer and tackling the sluggish shower drainage. Then I made up some wild garlic pesto from the wild garlic that had been languishing in the fridge whilst listening to Claudia Rankine on the radio. The pesto was rather tasty so rather than wash out the blender thing I whizzed just a bit of water to clean it out and ended up with a nice light dressing for a mint, cucumber, melon and tomato salad and found the shadiest bit of the garden to have lunch and read a bit more of Piranesi which I’m eking out because I’m enjoying it so much.
Then I went for a late cycle to the old swim spot on my own today… or so I thought… until I spotted this fella dried up on the shore as I emerged from my swim. I wonder if it’s because of the drop in the lake level although not really sure that would account for it. I was also joined by a myriad of very alive lightening blue damselflies.

Extract from Citizen: “Some years there exists a wanting to escape...” - Claudia Rankine

Some years there exists a wanting to escape—
you, floating above your certain ache—  
still the ache coexists.
Call that the immanent you—
 
You are you even before you
grow into understanding you
are not anyone, worthless,
not worth you.
 
Even as your own weight insists
you are here, fighting off
the weight of nonexistence.
 
And still this life parts your lids, you see
you seeing your extending hand
as a falling wave—

… and one of her music selections which I haven’t heard for ages …

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utkjl0ePDX4