Before and after

One of the easier IKEA jobs I’ve done down the years.

I needed a better chair with a higher back. This will make it much easier to sleep at my desk when I should be working after a hard day in the home office as the headrest is higher and the back is more suited to my tall figure.

Other "achievements" today:

* Went to the dump - always a pleasure, never a chore. They seemed pleased to see me.
* Tidied my office.
* Did a bit of writing (see below - "Sunshine and Shitstorms"). Not the best but from the heart.
* Cooked supper. The air fryer does a good job on puff pastry, so I found out tonight.
* Cleaned the kitchen (twice).
* Watched the final episode of season 1 of Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power. Clever ending I thought. And the Gandalf story arc looks like it will be a lulu in Season 2. 

Back to work proper tomorrow. Great. 

Bit worried about this https://www.blipfoto.com/entry/3029081518082363119

Wish I was ten years younger and could get involved.

Sunshine and shitstorms

There is a lot of bad stuff going on in the world - some of it big like Covid, Ukraine and our political and economic nightmares here in the UK - some of it closer to home.

There is always something to be down about. Logically you could say to yourself “how can you be happy when you know our sun is going to explode in a few million years time and the universe will eventually implode?” 

How do you earn the right to be happy if you care about these things? Because you do have to earn the right to be happy. You have to show care and compassion and at times even fight for what you believe in (I use the word fight in its broadest sense). 

You don’t have the right to be happy 24/7 when other people need you to show these qualities. But where is the balance? Do I have to be caring ten hours a day in order to earn two hours of happiness? 

Ask a parent or carer that really puts lots in for their loved ones whilst holding down a job. They’ve undoubtedly earned a beer and a TV show in the evening (assuming they can stay awake for it). But they might have to grind out a lot of hours first. Does that mean you earn the right to take it easy when you get older? As someone who is semi-retired and whose three children are grown up I feel I’ve earned the right to cut myself a bit of slack after decades of being there for other people. But not only does this make me feel guilty, I now have more time to worry about all the the  shitstorms and think about what I should be doing to ameliorate them.

And then there is the matter of soul food. We are at heart creative creatures, whether we are creating with paint, food, words, makeup, clothes, hobbies, relationships. These things are all an act of creation and massively underestimated in a world focused on work and breeding the next generation.

We talk a lot about work / life balance when what we should be talking about is the balance between responsibility, self care and creativity. Three dimensions, not two. And maybe care and compassion operate across all three.