Meantime, in a Kirkwall Cafe

Jessie:  Mind on Margaret Clouston - last week she telt me she'd had an oot of body experience.

Ina: Was she in the Co-op in Brora?   She wis ?  Well that's a weel kent phenomenal.

Jessie:  By the way, I see Sandra Stockan has cancelled  the coalman because his eyes are too close together.

Ina: That's no what I'd heard.  During his last  delivery he caught his sack on the door hinge. She misunderstood and went in for a poultice. 

Jessie:  And did ye no notice he was always at No 39 - even though she was all gas !!

Ina: Aye, his horse was always ootside

Jessie:  Yes but I've heard he prefers the high beam.

Ina: Have you seen R D Jackson 's new arthouse book ?

Jessie:  Whit's it aboot ?

Ina: It's aboot 572 pages.

Jessie:  Whit are you having for tea?

Ina:  Rissoles

Jessie:  There's no need to flight on me.

Ina:  Where's your decorum?

Jessie: It's next to my Yardley talc.

Ina: I saw Rubber Arse walking doon Provost Munro Drive.  Her man was up in court again.

Jessie: Was that incident with Mrs Munro's bicycle saddle  ?

Ina:  Appairantly he turned his nose up at it.

Jessie:  Mind on the philosophical view that originated in the early 20th century -  analytic philosophy?  Well her at No 14, that flirts with onything in breeks,  thinks  Bertrand Russell promoted such thoughts widely.  But l contend that during his early works, his Austrian-born pupil and colleague, Ludwig Wittgenstein, endeavoured to define a version of logical atomism.

Ina: Yes that's all very well but some philosophers in the Vienna Circle were also influenced by logical atomism, especially Rudolf Carnap, deeply sympathetic to some of its philosophical aims, especially in his earlier works. 

Jessie: Of course, even the milkman mentioned that Gustav Bergmann also developed a form of logical atomism that focused on an ideal phenomenalistic language, particularly in his discussions of J.O. Urmson's work on analysis.

Ina: It's hardly safe to leave the back door unlocked.

Jessie:  l see Andrew's got the corgis.

Ina: ls it nae just the way he walks?

Jessie: Are you going to Bingo the night ?

Ina: Have you finished with that sausage roll?

Jessie:  Are you teaching yon bloody tea bag to swim ?