The Team

Some of the team today after we had been to see the new ‘experience’ of Queens with Means. Having been so dreadfully disappointed with the re presentation in the castle our expectations were not high, but we were proved wrong. A really well done, modern, technological experience that will enhance any visitors experience. 

So, we returned to the education centre for coffee, short team bonding game and then down to business! I had mistakenly thought they might go easy on me! I love every one of them, but boy, some of them are hard work. 

First the Queens with Means. How do we schedule it into a school visit? The experience itself takes 6 minutes, and that’s if there’s no queue, and no showing already playing. Then there is an exhibition, which some will want to look at. So, do we offer it as part of the tour and then just run through the castle without stopping? Or do we offer as part of their free time and run the risk of them not returning in time? Or do we forget to tell them it’s there? These and several other options were discussed at great length. They all have a different opinion and so many ‘buts’. 

Next the stage! During Covid, to enable us to distance ourselves, using simple tape in the floor we marked out a square which we tell the children is the stage they are performing on. The tape needs replacing, but this too caused more differences of opinion. Some want it replaced, some want it replaced but moved sideways or only three sided and some want it removed altogether. 

Finally coat hooks! Oh goodness me! Thirty minutes to decide where we could put coat hooks in the room, for our coats as we enter. So many choices it would seem. In the end I decided. I told them it was no longer open for discussion and I had made the choice. 

It doesn’t sound much, but it seemed that every point took forever, with such minor details being exploded into huge world shattering problems. It has always been like this, but for me today it was exhausting, and having been away for a couple of months I had forgotten. And really, could no one see how petty it was for me to have to think these were such huge problems that needed resolving!

Enough of my grumpiness! Thank you for the phone call this evening Eileen, good to talk and I realised as we spoke that it was 5 weeks today. How I ask myself have I survived five weeks without him? 

After the meeting today we went for lunch and general conversation took place. One of them turned to me and asked if I was going away, having a holiday. I do get that other people can’t even contemplate my situation, and maybe I was a bit snappy when I retorted that I didn’t consider myself even capable of living at home on my own, let alone going on holiday; but honestly, what was he thinking?! Do some people think this is it? She’s cared for him, watched him die, had a funeral, said goodbye and now life is back to normal?! 

I’ve read that back and it sounds bleak. Today wasn’t a bad day really, I just let my thoughts run away with me, and let the small inconsiderate remarks get to me, when really I should just not worry about them. So, apologies to readers if my journal is becoming a constant gripe and moan, or too self centred!