It's tough being the size of a spider

*stomp*

If you are good tomorrow I'll sing you my spider plant song.

Jim announced suddenly (possibly due to the spate of early deaths including my cousin and the fella down to road) that he didn't need a will. I said I knew. We have eff all. .

He also said I'd get his pension.

I said I knew. I'd married him for it after all. That and the cool name (who wouldn't want to be Dr champion? Saved me from changing my name to strange via deed poll). Mostly the cool name, but I do thing of these things sometimes.

Obviously I'd been going out with him for 13 years and I hate weddings so it was only a technicality really. I'm not really a gold digger for his hefty teachers pay.

I told him to put me in a cardboard box and shove me into the incinerator when I found out how much those Eco burials cost. Maybe I'll start a new career as a cadaver. The hospital set fire to you for free then right??? Humm.

Wonder who would get my dolls...