Rest Home

My Dear Princess and Dear Friends,

So Justine and Feefs are here. "Do you have any plans? Do you want to do anything?" I asked. 

"Nah."

"Nah."

Let me explain. These are women with CHILDREN. There are no children here. All they want to do while they stay with us is:

- Be on the couch
- Watch telly
- Not have children

So that is pretty much how today went. It helps that the weather outside is shitty so we have legitimate reason to do eff all squared. Also, there are cats. Justine and Feefs love cats and they have especially fallen in love with Dave the Cat who has been making himself very popular with cuddles and purrs and being generally adorable. 

It wasn't quite as boneless as all that. We did go to Caro's favourite restaurant The Surfer's Mistress. We had typical Feefs/Caro conversation. We covered subjects such as:

- Pubic hair
"When I first developed it I was like a wild boar down there. Mum had to have a word."

- Kegel chairs
"They zap you right in the vagina and now I can lift weights with it."

- Soggy biscuit
"Why do they do it? Because GROSS BOYS, that's why."

Poor Justine was not used to this level of filth. "I've JUST FINISHED a lovely dinner!" she complained. But she is friends with Feefs so I know this is pure BS. 

When we got home, "Married At First Sight Australia" went on. "Bogan. We've got a bogan. This is going to be GREAT," said Caro.

So day 1 at the rest home has been entirely successful as far as I can see. And here is a picture of Feefs to illustrate this.

S.