THE BIG QUESTION

Wilson is caught on the horns of a dilemma!
He loves fireworks and bonfires, but – particularly while COP26 is taking place – he feels guilty about contributing to air pollution with these smoky delights…
He is in, as he put it, a predicament, a quandary, an awkward situation.
'It's a conundrum, New Dad' he told me.
'I love fireworks, and I love bonfires, but they're so smoky and polluting!'
When I was a kid I loved Fireworks Night, but as I've grown older I have become a lot less keen on it – and now that the bangs in the night have started to last from Diwali until New Year's Eve, I'm bordering on hostile.
I don't think fireworks and bonfires can contribute much to air pollution compared to, say, driving a diesel car or Boris Johnson's private jet, but I'm leaving Wilson to wrestle with his conscience on this one, and not offering my own opinion.
I've now left Wilson to his One Anteater Brains Trust, and I will wait and see what decision he finally reaches.
Of course, the fact that he's got a bit of a crush on Greta Thunberg might sway his decision…