Ladybird racing

Day 9 of the AOG saw the most controversial yet.

The main event of the day was the Mixed Ladybird Race (with rider); a race complying with gender equality guidelines and featuring female Ladybirds as well as male (Ladybird male; is that an oxymoron?)

Even before the start, the behaviour of the males was appalling (isn't it always?) with seven males chanting
"Ladybird, Ladybird,
Fly away home, your house is on fire, etc."

While this was deeply upsetting to the three female contestants, far worse was to come.

The males all chose an aphid as their rider, while the females were a lot more shrewd (aren't they always?).

The race started and before the end ALL the males had eaten their riders and were thus disqualified.

The three medals went to the three female competitors and our featured photograph is the winner with her Gold Medal and mollusc rider.

A single male then proved what a bad loser he was and was heard to utter,
"It's not fair, females are always on diet so they would not be tempted to eat their riders!).

Well, that was too much and the offender was immediately expelled from the Games and banned for competition for life.

There is just no place in the modern world for such words which trumped every other gender bias vitriol ever spoken.