A Bulgarian performing a tonsillectomy

Today, armed with our dive certificates, we waited for a minibus to take us to day 1 of our PADI scuba course. When it turned up, we found we were the only people on the course!

We were in Queensland during their summer, their wet season, and their cyclone season - tourists were a bit thin on the ground!

After a morning of watching videos, learning the theory and being tested, we had come to the conclusion that our instructor was indeed a complete muppet.

Still, we persevered (although, it turns out, the answer to the question: "what thing beginning with W is vital to a safe dive" Isn't "water").

The afternoon brought the first practical session, but first a swimming test (perfect after lunch!) 8 lengths of their pool, plus treading water for 10 minute.

I'm a confident swimmer, but I do not float. Treading water for that long worried me, but with the aid of Jason's (the muppet instructor) love of his own voice, the time slid by and I gratefully groped for the side!

Next came the real stuff. All kitted up, we practiced breathing and swimming underwater. A surreal experience!

We learnt the safety aspects first as you would expect, such as hand signals and using your dive buddies air supply if yours goes up the spout!

But there was just one design flaw in the equipment - as you swim, the bubbles dislodge the goggles and allow a small amount of water to leak in. Not so bad, but if you breath in through your nose at the same time as your mouth (think about it...), that water goes straight up and you start choking - not great when you're at the bottom of a 2 meter swimming pool, but down right dangerous when you're 15 meters underwater out to sea!

At this point, muppet features excelled him self by telling Sophie:

"Watching you scuba dive is like watching a Bulgarian perform a tonsillectomy"

To this date I don't know what he meant.

He also suggested that Sophie could stop the water going up her nose, by closing the flap at the back of her nose.

....

a flap?

...

There is no flap.

After making it to the end of day 1, we decided that perhaps with a bad instructor and an apparent lack of nose flaps, we had better stick to snorkelling!

So as the day was spent underwater or in a classroom, the only photo I have to show you is of a wild turkey wondering through our campsite!