A Hancock and bull story.....

Dear friends, I know you'll be sad to hear this, but I've just lost my extremely lucrative position in the healthcare sector.....

Strictly between ourselves, I'm only almost a doctor (I know - you're gobsmacked) but it was just the teeniest leap from threadworms to thoracic surgery, and I never intentionally lost a patient....

What's that you say? How did I get that sort of job when my only qualifications are a First Aid badge from the Brownies and a (sketchy) working knowledge of electronic nit combs?

Well if you must know, I was in the Tufty Club with the Chairman of the Health Board.

But now, a photo has come to light of him tickling me behind the swings (not a euphemism) and the Reader's Digest is threatening to publish.

If you're looking for me tomorrow, I'll be back amongst the Germaloid and Anusol creams. It's a real pain in the arse.....