Dublin SPCA - Standing Up for Animals

and big useless SUVs...

- Here Boss, the revenue figures for 2012 have been published... It's not brilliant.
- What would you expect Donnacha, the country is being hit by an economic crisis of unprecedented magnitude!
- After wages, property rental, insurance and advertising, we have about 30k left for capital expenses in 2013. And we badly need to replace the van. I've seen a decent looking Berlingo for 3.5K
- A Berlingo?! Are you nuts?! We are a reputable Emergency Response Unit, we cannot be seen in a poxy little Berlingo
- (...)
- What did you say the budget was? 30K? I can get an almost new Mitsubishi Warrior for 28K, and we still have enough petty cash for the diesel for at least three weeks.
- Do... do... do we really need an SUV, Boss?
- Remember that squirrel with the broken angle in the Dublin Mountains in December 2006? Do you think that you would have got to her in time, in your Berlingo? We've got a business case. And I'm the boss.
- But wouldn't we be able to rescue more animals if the capital spending wasn't so high?
- Don't bug me with your 1st year business school nonsense, Donnacha. It's not how many animals we rescue, it's how we rescue them. Many an abused dogs would not be seen dead in a Berlingo. The feel of the leather seats of the Warrior on the other hand, and the quiet powerful purr of the 2.5 turbocharged diesel engine immediately creates a haven of piece and reassurance for the stressed animal.
- Now that you put it this way, Boss...
- You bet! You have to understand animal psychology, Donnacha. Oh, and we'll get the dealer to fit LCD screens in the headrests, like I've seen on Pimp-My-Emergency-Response-Unit-Warrior. We can play Lassie to them, or Black Beauty, or Free Willie. Something inspirational and uplifting.
- You're the boss, Boss...
- You bet. If I weren't a fierce defender of animal rights, I'd got as far as admitting to being the dog's bollix...