Caro On The Couch

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellows,

Caro wasn't for doing anything today. She announced this fairly early on. I even offered to help her dig holes in the garden. 

"I don't think so," she said, snuggling further down under her couch-blanket.

So it was a day of cat-playing, telly-watching and napping for Caro. 

I put on another episode of "Naked Attraction" for her and I must admit I marvelled at the sheer amount of piercings that people have. 

"I can now see the point of this show," I observed. "After all, fancy if you met that woman at a bar and then only when you were both in bed did you realise that she's got all that ironmongery down there."

Well. I don't know about you. It would put me off. Those things look pokey and sharp. 

The other thing I find about this show is how very unimaginative the men are when making comments about naked women. There's lots of "oh yes, that's a very tidy vagina" as if the woman has just got in there with a damp cloth and a dustbuster. But yes. That's about all men can think to say. "Yes. Yes. Nice and tidy." 

I mean. It's not exactly poetry is it?

When it comes to boobs, it gets even worse. There's a lot of "very nice, very symmetrical".

F***ing SYMMETRICAL? 

Even I'M roughly symmetrical. 

Or at least, I thought I was. Maybe I'd better check. 

Uh-oh. 

Wonky.

Right. That's it. I'm going back to bed.

S.