Tetrissing

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellows,

I remember the day before New Zealand went into lockdown. There was a loudmouthed bloke at work talking about hoarding. He had a test, he said. "Do ya have bread in ya freezer? Do ya? Do ya?"

Well, yes I do have bread in my freezer. Although actually I ALWAYS have bread in my freezer. Also milk. It's not so much to do with hoarding, it's more to make sure we don't run out. Milk is obvious. Running out of coffees for Caro could cause riots. But the bread is for me. I love bread in all its forms. I start the day with toast, I slide into the afternoon on a sandwich. I may have a late afternoon toastie. Often I sup up the remains of dinner with a nude slice and then as you know, the late night horror film demands tea and toast because tradition.

I know, I know. I overdo it. I am probably working my way toward triggering a gluten allergy and shitting all over the place. I will consider it to have been worth it. 

So obviously on our last shop I did my utmost to ensure we have enough bread stocked up so that I don't have to leave my bubble again too soon. This led me to another word I've been coming across lately, "tetrissing". I'm assuming it is not just a Kiwi thing, but the verb "to tetris" refers to the act of packing so efficiently that you can fit your loaves of bread in with the Magnums, the fish fingers and those weird bloody frozen herbal drink things that your wife bought that time but it looks like she'll leave them in there until the end of time.

I am getting pretty good at the tetrissing now. I might have to try it on my knicker drawer next.

In other news - GIANT MANTIS! She was the biggest one I've seen in the house so far. But mantises are funny to watch. The don't seem to walk as such. They wobble. They just sort of shake and wobble along. And then they fall over. They're like Caro climbing out of a black cab after a night out. 

At least that's what I thought. But when I put a glass over the top of her, she SHOT off up the side of the glass. So they can run when they need to. Again, like Caro. 

I put her outside and she wobbled off into the long grass to tear the heads off future husbands. 

And I shall stop with the Caro comparisons right there.

S.

p.s. Caro just used the adjective "c*nting" to describe a pot of sour cream that she couldn't tetris into the fridge. This struck me as a bit extreme for a dairy product. She clearly takes tetrissing very seriously.