It's beginning to look a lot like....

....the horoscopes for 2020!!!


Sagittarius:

In September, you fulfil a lifetime's ambition by getting into the Guiness Book of Records.

After years of trying, you will grow a massive swede, which has a higher IQ than Donald Trump. (Admittedly, most vegetables are more intelligent than the president, but yours actually looks like him too!)

Truly, a turnip for the books!



Aries:

Exciting times in May, when you will meet a prospective new husband.
He's rich, educated, handsome....a veritable prince amongst men!

(Unfortunately, this prince is Prince Andrew......so best avoid for now.)