Mr. Sheen

My Dear Fellows and Dear Princess,

Here is Jasper LOOMING over me, waiting for his breakfast. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

On Thursday, Lemon and I were both a bit fed up. The week seemed to be going on forever. And Lemon claimed she was "off".

How does this manifest itself, I asked her.

"Oh, you know. Sometimes things are a bit off. Like they have a sheen over everything," she said.

I had no idea what she was talking about.

She explained that in her dreams, there's this dreamlike "shimmer" over everything. I imagined it like that Natalie Portman film where she goes into the big shimmery dome and there's a weird bear-thing*.

But I digress. Lemon claimed that sometimes when she's dreaming it's only the sheen that allows her to realise that she is, in fact, asleep and dreaming. "Well, that and the fact that I'm talking to Kermit," she added.

And if you are now thinking that Lemon's dreams sound way more trippy and fun than yours, you are not alone.

But Thursday, she told me, had a dreamlike sheen on it, even though she was not dreaming. She was listless and demotivated. I could tell, because every time Smock stepped away from her desk, Lemon would sigh, push away her work and start a conversation. She told me all about her grand-daughter.

"The Monster Child," said Lemon. 

Apparently, her grand-daughter is an incredibly screamy baby. "I've got dozens of pictures of me holding this child at arm's length because it looks like she is trying to eat my head," said Lemon. 

So that was Thursday. She kept me talking so long that I forgot to go out for lunch. "No matter," I said when she apologised. "I'll just have a two-hour lunch tomorrow, since I've worked up the hours."

I do this a lot. If I work extra hours, then Friday becomes Fun Day and I spend my lunchtime farting about and working a short day. 

Lemon was intrigued by this and asked if she could join in. So today we went to Americano's. You may remember this is my favourite lunch place - an all-day breakfast restaurant. Lemon was delighted. She too, loves Eggs Benedict.

So that was two hours out of Friday. The rest of the day was ok, if a little boring. But I heartily recommend the long lunch. And as it turns out, Americano's is closing in two weeks! They do not meet earthquake standards and are being closed down.

"Pfff!!" I said, disgusted. "What sort of reason is that!? I don't care if I get twenty tons of rubble dumped on my head, so long as I get it with poached eggs!"

So Lemon and I have decided we have to do this again next week. After that, we may have to return to regular lunchtimes. Until the next time the sheen appears or Kermit shows up.

S.

* Warning: This film is not as much fun as I am making it sound.