Mixed Feelings About My Life

Today was a very weird day for me. I was with this guy I'm literally in love with, but I can't stand him at the same time. He pisses me the fuck off. Is that completely wrong?? Damn, sometimes I wish things between us could just be simple, but that could never be. Today I had a huge lump in my throat, threatening to rise up and make me cry. I forced it back down and swallowed my feelings. This is what he does to me. Sometimes I wonder if it is all worth it.