Fluttering Around @ Butterfly Terrace

Let me remember just one remarkable experience. It really reveals an effect in such a crucial way. Suddenly, somewhere in the afternoon while reading some lines in my Rogers-pocket - Person to Person - it HAPPENED.
I felt liberated, completely free to play at drawing, putting colours on paper or playing the picolo.
Free to get in touch with that "Autre Moi" -Other Me. The wordless "child" that loves music, cuddling, loves to reach out and touch this world rich in sacred things. Yes, loves to live, enjoys this summerlife full of colours.
For a long time already Ihad been puzzling with worriesabout lack of time and energy to integrate all my creative activities in a social, non solitairy way. Staying in loving contact with W (and of course with M&D), doing things together. And now, as with a shock I realise what Wilson Van Dusen was telling me. Or must I say, what he was doing in his essay on "The inner nature of man". It had immediately been cristal clear (and not only because I had been here before!) that it has to be a matter of empathic wisdom and growth in humanity to leave this predominant  selfconcept of being a reasonable man and step back. Just to meet this Other Me. This unknown inner world of streaming feelings and emotions again. I had done that before in the 80-ies and 90-ies together with Mischa. Learning from her. I still have all the pictures, drawings and recordings, somewhere...
But now it really had to be my unique turn, my chance. To discover how it feels: being afraid or ashamed for nobody, not even my own rigid, judgemental and perfectionis Ego. Not for any (Blip-)friend. To laugh and feel liberated from this old burden of ultimate failure. Yes, I can, I may feel myself as happy as that little blue tit, that just came to wash itself in the waterbasin under Our Pinkflowered Budleia.