A wing and a prayer

It has been about 6 months, since my radio show was terminated.......

It was quite traumatic.  We did the show, Cheryl asked if I had time for a coffee.  Over coffee, she told me, that they were immigrating to Ireland and that there would be changes at the radio station.  And, that was that.  I never did another show.  I never even said goodbye to the handful of people, who listened.  I never got my files and things.  I was really hurt and disappointed. 

Out of the blue, about a week ago, Cheryl invited me to her house for coffee, to discuss the radio station, going further. 

Must confess, I didn't really think there was a future, but I wanted access to my files i.e. past shows, so, after STEP and zen pilates, I went to her house........... to catch up.

In terms of the radio station - someone is taking it over and they are keen to continue my show.  Yah !  No specifics were given.  No names.  No phone numbers. No dates. No co-host.

In terms of my files, they're all there, I can get them.  But no formal plan, was made to hand them over.

In terms of them going............... they are leaving on 23 July, with NOTHING.  I kid you not, 2 forty something year old adults and 3 teen-agish children, with a couple of suitcases.  At this point in time, neither of the adults has a job, they do not know where they will stay, they have borrowed the money to buy the air tickets and have not sold their house in South Africa.

OMG !

They are going on a wing and a prayer ! 

The steady trickle of people I know, leaving, coupled with Mom's hijack, prompted me to seriously consider leaving South Africa.

NOTE :  It was not the crime per se, that upset me, it was the realization, that there is NO INFRASTRUCTURE, for elderly people in South Africa, now, never mind in 20 years time, when I am an elderly people, with no daughter to rely on.  

But, I am afraid.........

Afraid of the weather, both the experience of it, as well as the impact on my health.  I might be genetically programmed to live in Europe, but I am developmentally programmed to live in Africa. 

Afraid of starving, because whatever money "we have", divided by nearly 20, leaves very little.  Okay, probably won't starve, but eating "crap" will not serve me, from a health perspective.  I know I don't have the wiggle room to get by, 6 months of eating cheap junk food and not exercising, will leave me with T2DM.

Afraid of never "fitting in".  I know, I don't exactly fit in here, but at least, I have shared experiences with the people here. Although, I am losing the friends, I do have here, little by little.....

Afraid of not being able to get a job or earn enough money to "retire". 

AFRAID !

Clearly, I am not AFRAID enough of South Africa, in 20 years time, to hop on a plane, with just a suitcase.  Maybe I should be, but I am NOT.

PS.  I spent the afternoon, trying to apply for a British passport, AGAIN. This time I got to the end, to find, I need a birth certificate for Mom.  No idea why,  I wouldn't be applying based on her genealogy.   Although I could.  Right now, WE do not have a birth certificate for Mom.  So, at the last moment, I abandoned the process.

WE will have to try get a birth certificate from Home Affairs, to continue.  I suspect, this will require lots of prayer....... after all, she was born 87 years ago, in a time, where electronic records did not exist. And nothing about the South African Dept of Home Affairs, sparks confidence.