Gin and Tonic?

I am a fan of violet gin these days and felt I deserved one at the end of the day.  Such a pretty colour.

It's been a bit of a day.

We did some bits of housework this morning because we were having visitors for tea.  Then the phone rang.  The nurse at Mom's nursing home wanted to know what I  wanted them to do as Mom was very weak and they felt they needed to call a doctor or an ambulance.  I said I would go there, leaving Rob in charge of dinner for 8.

When I got there, the nurse had already called an ambulance as the our of hours doctor service would have involved a long wait.  Mom was very like she was on Thursday - very erratic breathing, drifting in and out.  

I can't go through the whole story but the paramedics came.  She will stay in the nursing home.  The Out of Hours doctor came to prescribe medication to make her comfortable and to go through the resuscitation paperwork with us.

We want her to have peace.  The words "End of Life Care" are ones I find difficult but am becoming more at ease with them.  Supporting other members of the family is the role I have to fill. I have to feel my way gently through that - for me and for them - and for my Mom.

I was pleased that Mom's cousin and her husband from Portsmouth were able to see her today.  I am pleased that we had a lovely family meal beautifully cooked by SHH.  We toasted Mom and drank to her.  We wait and wonder.  We wait in love.