Mothering Sunday in the UK

I always find this day difficult. 
So I am posting a piece from a blog I used to write after Matt's death.
I make no apologies for it. Even now 13 years on grief can suddenly flood out at unexpected times and events. 
The price of love. 
 Here is the piece I wrote in 2009. 
 "
Mothering Sunday last year, 2009, saw me again on the M6 driving North, as my dad had been taken ill. I was there two and a half weeks.

I took my cards with me and the gifts I had been given. And as I drove, I thought how ironic it was to be driving on that particular day,  when once again I drove passed the site of the accident, deliberately, a defiant homage to you, Matt.

I have two sons,
Forever in my thoughts.
And prayers
And tears and love
Anguish
Joy
Pride
Wonder
Sadness and gladness.
 
To hold you when you were born
Was the most amazing thing I have ever known,
To say goodbye the most profound
Deep
Dark
Grief.
Two brothers
Now one without the other
Scarred
But we remember
You
 
On Mothering Sunday, I will run the gauntlet of loss once more "

In a week of deepest joy and celebration on the birth of our 4th grandchild there is always one person missing, forever, until we meet him again.