A Fart In A Trance

My Dear Fellows & Dear Princess,

It felt as if we all decided to have today off. We really did very little. There was a trip down to the Mount to get ice-cream and look at the shops but really, that was it.

The rest of the time I either spent with Tiggy in the garden or lying with Tiggy on the bed. He was very happy.

When it came to dinner time, I thought it was mean to get either Feefs or Craig to cook for us so suggested I pay for a delivery instead. Feefs fancied Thai, but Craig was not so sure. She was frustrated.

"Oohhh! You could AT LEAST look at the menu!" she complained. Then added, "ya big... ya big... FART."

Which cracked us all up. I haven't heard of anyone being called an actual FART for ages. There are so many other names you can call people nowadays and FART seems so mild. Friendly, even.

It was at this point that Cazza chipped in. Apparently a friend of hers regularly refers to her husband as "a fart in a trance" when he is dithering or being useless. 

As in, "Och, don't just stand there like a fart in a trance".

If you have never heard it before, this is my gift to you. Take it, use it, enjoy it. I just can't wait for Cazza to be useless so I can aim it squarely at her and let go the bow-string of insult. Wheeeeeeee.

In other news, Tiggy laid all over me and Cazza while we watched telly. And farted. And farted. There was nothing trance-like about his bowels. Maybe Feefs slipped him some Thai food.

S.