the Bag Lady

This is one of the most important people in my life.  She’s retiring from the NHS soon so Anniemay and I took the opportunity to catch her on a tea break and buy her a cup of tea.  It’s the least I can do.

She’s a stoma care nurse.  Please skip the next couple of paragraphs if you’re squeamish or about to have your tea.  

I had surgery for bowel cancer some years ago and the operation went horribly wrong.  A few days after the operation I had an emergency ileostomy - a stoma bag was fitted to my small intestine - it acted a food-waste bypass, allowing the wounds caused during the original surgery to my large bowel to heal.  This took almost two years.

I was in hospital for a month and every day this lady would come to visit me to make sure that I was coping with the trauma of the surgery - and coming to terms with having to wear a stoma bag.  I called her The Bag Lady - a name she was more than happy to answer to.  

Anyone who’s had a colostomy or an ileostomy (the former is attached to the large bowel, the latter to the small bowel) will understand what a life-changing fashion accessory it can be.  I did wonder about wearing a kilt and hiding it in the sporran, but I don’t really have the knees for the kilt.

Really squeamish bit coming up:  

It was The Bag Lady who determined when I could go home - not the consultant.  It wasn’t until she was happy that I could manage my stoma - that is take a dirty bag off, look at this bit of my intestine poking through the wall of my stomach, clean it and then attach a new bag to it.  Only when I could do that without wanting to throw up or faint, did she sign the discharge papers.

I continued to see her every few weeks right up until I was declared ready to have the thing taken off.

It wasn’t just me she took care of.  She considered Anniemay to be her patient as well;  she understood that loved ones would be affected by the procedure as well the patient.

I don’t have sufficient command of language to describe just how kind, caring, dedicated …. and essential she was to my healing process.  With her help I did come to terms with my stoma.  I wore it under my lycra shorts when on the bike - not a good look - and even managed to gig with it.  Even so - I was bloody glad when it came off.