It's Five O'Clock Somewhere....

So we left Lawrenceburg and headed for Nashville - another 216 miles. 

We found ourselves in the centre of Nashville very easily - who knew that these GPS systems actually worked.  (ours is called Ginny).   It took us over an hour to find a parking space near our AirB&B and we were delighted eventually to find a free space, only 2 blocks. 

Sadly, that was as good as the night got. 

This was our very first AirB&B Disaster.   

We knew the house was old... the owner stressed this often, emailing me to remind me that the house was built in 1908, and that it had been a stopping off point for Johnny Cash and Kris Kristopherson (probably when they were out of their heads on heroin (hearsay)..... This didn't bother me - Toolibelle has lived in flats which were built in 1860  - and I stayed in a flat with a resident Heroin addict.  Neither distressed me greatly. 

He told me it was "quirky" and showing signs of age, but SPOTLESSLY Clean and the in the BEST Safest neighbourhood. 

When we arrived outside the building, and had the first inkling that something wasn't right.  Once we had clambered over the drunk on the stairs from the street, the main doorway was wide open to the world.   Not the secure door we were expecting. 

The smell in the doorway resembled, mmm how do I say it?  Stale Sex?  Piss?  Something better?  I think not. 

We climbed the stairs, hoping against hope for a really BIG surprise  - and as the man pulling up his trousers and tucking himself in, fell out of the door next to our door, with two skantily dressed females, who "thank you for your time, come again soon" -  we got one.  ( now I understood the review which said "the walls are paper thin, so you have to be comfortable with listening to your neighbours business)

The door was made of balsa wood, and to have a combination lock on it was pathetic.  The two stoned prostitutes could have fallen against it and it would have opened. 

Inside was an armchair with an assortment of stains which I couldn't make myself analyse, but I would guess at semen, piss and vomit.   The two beds looked like they had clean sheets on them, however, the fact that both beds went "boing" like zebedee when we sat down (i wasn't putting my sweaty arse on that chair) we realised that the stains under the sheets were probably as interesting as the chair. 

I did not venture into the kitchen or the bathroom - i didn't need to.  There weren't doors and I could see most of them from the "living area".   Himself came out of the bathroom and said "we aren't staying here".    There was something on the floor of the bath, which appeared to be a scientific experiement.  The shower curtain was held by two bent wires.  The bathroom sink had no ceramic round the plug hole - and a crack running from the taps down to it.  Quite how the water stayed in I'm unsure.     The one curtain in the living room had one hook, but the curtain rail was a V Shape.  nothing was closing over in that room. 

I did quite like the three live music bands directly across the road all playing their little hearts out, and all open til 3 am. :-0 

We plugged his internet in - once we had decided which of the twenty plugs taped together was the internet, and found another hotel.  I emailed him to tell him; "well done, you got another sucker". 

We arrived at our next hotel, and smiled.  A clean bed - so big we couldn't reach each other from the opposite sides.  A shower with nothing growing on the bottom.

Anyways -  that was it. over and one with.   The guy emailed me in the morning apologised and said he would send cleaners over for a "reclean and a new set of curtains".  I told him demolition and a rebuild would be the only thing to help. 

After a great nights sleep, and a breakfast (included in the revised price), we got back in the car and headed for Lynchburg.   

I think you might have realised both of us have a predilection for Bourbon -  Jack Daniell's little business operates out of Lynchburg. 

Oh my. What a drive!  USA has plenty to see.  If you can get a car and drive!  

You arrive at Jack Daniells, park, are met by a representative, and are bussed over to the Visitors Centre.   You are given the opportunity to use the rest rooms and then are called in your groups to start the tour. 

Another bus takes you to the start of the process.  Corn, Rye, and Barley - in a different percentage than Wild Turkey.   Mashing, Fermenting, filtering, Aging.  Ooooh So Lovely.  

The photo is Si, sitting at the ACTUAL spring where Jack set up his first distillery and brewed his first bourbon.  The walls of the spring cave are blackened because Jack stood there and burnt the wood to make the charcoal to filter his whisky. 

It's Kentucky bourbon because it's filtered through charcoal.  We saw the wood they buy in to burn to make charcoal.  We saw the wood they buy in to make the barrels. We saw the barrel making process.  

The one thing which I loved - the photo in extra - a photo of Jack's first employees - with Jack.  And Jack is standing next to his best friend, and the Master distiller - Nearest Green.   (Nearest is sitting - Jack was very short, but a very smartly dressed man).   Nearest was the first enslaved black American Master Distiller.    He taught Jack how to make whisky. 

Also pictured - my friend in the bottling plant who kindly posed for me.  Me and Jack, On the Rocks.  - And our Official Jack Daniels Tour Shot. 

The tasting room was amazing - beautifully fitted out in Barrel Aged Oak.   The Tasting was delish!  The shop was lovely. Weirdly  The county Lynchburg is in, is dry.  You can't buy alcohol.  no sir, you can't. No whisky, no bourbon.  Weird.  What they sell in the shop are Commemorative Bottles, with free contents. :-) 

After we toured the Distillery; we headed to the town of Lynchburn - like 100 metres away from the distillery.  If you took away the cars, and the electrical lines - this is 1820's America.  The buildings, the streets, dare I say, the people. 

I was slightly taken aback at the tee's - "I know how to load more than my washing machine" with a big machine gun under her heaving bosum, and  "If you're gonna knee, do me a favour and knee under the bus".  This is a little old time town who favour their Amendments and love Trump.  They are very, very small town.   Our Tour Guide advised us with some pride, that he licences his car in the very same town hall Jack licenced his distillery, and that next month, for the very first time ever he was gonna visit Washington DC, could we believe it?

He was standing in front of people from Scotland, LA, Washington, Florida.  We had all travelled further than he was going to travel to be there. 

All in all it was a lovely trip though, and it was amazing to be in the actual place that my other favourite drink is created!   

The afternoon of this day, is a bit of a hazy mess.