39 Steps

Dub Taylor - Your Soul ft. Vital

Climbing the stairs out of the darkness, only two elements keep me going forward; an upward motion and light. The darkness, as such, begins to engulf non-figurative concepts of aimlessness and unproductive navel gazing. Looking upwards and onwards is perhaps the first step, and as the body and heart follows, motion takes place. I'm not being concrete here (have I ever?) but beginning one's journey towards a goal, there has to be SOME way of talking about it, right?

But my negativity just keeps wondering if I'm walking towards a greater sense of self or just more darkness. The true meaning of nothing. Changing things to make things better is just like running away. I wonder how my relatives and old friends became the way they are? They are not perfect, yet they are to me. I know I'm not perfect, but I'm too proud, or more accurately, too insecure to admit it. Nobody has the ultimate set of values, but the brain just keeps thinking that.

Perhaps being alone is the best way to nullify others' expectations and decrepit self-worth, just to live truly comfortably. What is the real staircase and where the hell can I find it?

I know this is dark and if my real-life friends and family are reading this, please don't worry. I just need some sleep and good food. Much love. I'm just a bit cranky today, I was 30min late for my Japanese lesson.