Life Is A Mystery

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellows,

I was so bored at work today, then I had a lovely WhatsApp text chat with the Princess which (as usual) devolved in a who-can-use-the-rudest-word contest.

Typically, I lost.

But before she signed off for the day, the Princess put the song "Like A Prayer" in my head. So I spent the rest of the day listening to pop music. This brightened my day of writing boring documents about boring sh*te that no-one gives a flying eff about immeasurably.

It was while listening to ABBA and Madonna and Cyndi Lauper and others that I discovered the Amazon music app provides the lyrics so I can see what it was Blondie was going on about. 

It was a bit of a surprise. For years I have been singing:

Thought about love 
It was a gas 
Soon found out 
Had a heart of glass
Something something only to find
Something something on my behind

To be honest, I "something something" my way through most songs. Either I never heard the lyrics properly in the first place or have forgotten them. I feel a bit bad for clever songwriters who write cogent lyrics only to have drunken idiots like me only join in with the bits we all know. As far as I'm concerned, "Karma Chameleon" is just the "Red, Gold and Greeeeeeeeeeeen" song and I suspect most people just know "Brown-Eyed Girl" by its alternate title "La La La La La La La La La La La La Ti Da".

And then there's REM. I used to love them but never had any idea what the eff Michael Stipe was saying. I just used to mutter along with him, basically just making grunting noises. 

My version of the lyrics of "Pretty Persuasion" for example were:

It's my wand
In my hand
Oh have you found
My squirrel Clive?
There's a squirrel in this town
It's all wrong
Try to wear him on your feet
It's all wrong

When the internet was invented I was able to Google* the lyrics and found out that he had in fact been singing a gigantic lot of crap. My squirrel lyrics actually made a lot more sense.

So maybe Madge had a point. Life is a mystery. And sometimes it is better that way.

Like, why is this boat covered in penguins? 

I do not know. And it does not matter. It's a boat covered in penguins and today it made me happy.

S.

* Although actually this was back in the 90's when we used to "Yahoo" things, young people**.

** Which reminds me, hello EMP!