Fare thee well

Classically there are three reactions to a threat; fight, freeze or flee.
I fall with a stubbornness that can be a failing very firmly into one category. Hell, I don't always fall I've been known to run towards it. Like anything it's a learnt behaviour, and I'm adamant that it's a part of why I'm here today.
But. Always a but.
But perhaps not the best part of who I am. I'm better than that, and I do know it. Because to truly learn a thing, to have a mastery of it you must be able to see it from every perspective.
And that means walking away.
And for the longest time I equated that with failure. I'd rather plain lose than quit.

There are supposedly many paths to enlightenment, but mine was always vertical. On a cliff face I learnt that somethings cannot be beaten into victory, some victories are to be truly found in the surrender. Sometimes the truest victory is in the walking away.

Today has been a day of putting out fires, of letting loved ones fight their own battles, however hard that is to watch.

I've realised that an unpleasant professional situation is as resolved as it can ever be, that for the antagonist the only real outcome is the fight. Whilst a version of me would like to hammer home a final solution, this latterly wise* me knows that simply walking away is the only attainable win. Its not lost on me that it will cause angst, but a fire without fuel always falters.

To do so for a loved one is far far harder, but sometimes you have to be the support rather than the shield or the spear, even if it's not of your nature.

I was late to the murmuration, and missed the best of the light. I don't think it can be called peaceful, but encased in this swirling frenetic mass of nature a lot of things were put in their place. For anyone local thinking of visiting I don't know how much longer it will happen as apparently the landowner is actively trying to move the birds on :-(

*it's a very very small amount of wise, but I'm trying to nurture it.