My Sock Made A Bid For Freedom

My sock made a bid for freedom
Which may sound a little weird
But it leapt right out the laundry
And then it disappeared

I chased it to another room
Where it hid under the bed
Though it wasn't hard to find
(It's stripey green and red)

"Come out!" I cried in anger
(For it was my laundry day)
"I must dip you in detergent
So come forth without delay!"

"Shan't!" the sock it shouted back
"I will not step out there!"
I was quite shocked to find I had
Insubordinate underwear

My clothes I'd worn them three weeks
Without washing them you see
And in this time the sock had grown
A strong personality

I'm afraid this is a consequence
Of living like a vagrant
Your clothes become rebellious
As well as rather fragrant

Behind my back I was unaware
A plan was taking shape
My other clothes had sensed their chance
To make good their escape

Before I could have washed it all
And hung it out and pegged it
My shirts and ties all ran away
And then my trousers legged it

My smelly vests had climbed the walls
It was most unappealing
To find a host of underpants
Were sticking to the ceiling

Alas! If I had only thought
To wash my clothing oftener
It would have been more tolerant 
Of soap and fabric softener

A herd of socks pushed past me
And dashed across the floor
They leapt my fence and terrified
The man who lives next door

To think that this all started
With one unruly sock!
Panic reigned, the cops were called
My knickers ran amok

My dirty clothes were never caught
I believe they're running still
Just last week a pair of shorts
Emailed from Brazil

So let this be warning
Keep a regular laundry day
Or your dirty socks and pants
Might just get clean away