View from my sitting spot....

Well finally having enough energy to put down a few sentences about this ordeal. I have to say this experience has been much more daunting and challenging that i ever could have imagined.....but on the positive side i'm learning a lot about myself....always good to do even at the age of 65!!!

So a recap.....Monday 20th November was surgery day.... i had choosen to go with a lumbar anesthetic rather than a GA, and i'm very glad i did....the dr. taking care of me and administering the drugs was so sweet. As i walked into the OR (yes i had to just walk on in and is heading into a coffee shop!!!) the Beatles were playing....i commented on this and the dr. said when he recognised a British accent he assumed i would love the Beatles. He was of course right, and then when i told him i'd seen them live 2-3 times in Scotland he was over the moon with excitement! He then spent the next 10-15 minutes as he prepared me for surgery, chatting away about all things Beatles....it was very comforting for sure. being awake wasn't as traumatic as one might expect...mainly because i feel like i had prepared myself well for this event. listening to guided visualizations while the surgery took place, helped a lot, plus there was some sedation going on for sure! unfortunately i didn't respond well on the recovery side of things. spent the first 2 days throwing up......felt like i was in hell!!! Of course the total inability to move puts you into such a vulnerable place, and i was pretty scared and miserable.....also, hospitals are such chaotic noisy places, very difficult for an introverted person who is accustomed to a lot of quiet and space! so that part was particularly challenging. i also had the most extraverted room mate imaginable!!! she was of course a true Cape Bretoner....never stopped talking, called everyonee darling, honey, sweetheart etc.., and wanted to engage in family connection conversations with everyone that came into our room!!! exhausting to the max...but on the other side she and i had a lot of laughs, when i was able to start functioning again, and she was a sweetheart of a woman, just wished she'd talk less frequently.

i got home on friday afternoon, with the prospect of 18 or so folks arriving that evening....our annual meditation retreat was about to begin. so my first task upon getting home was chopping lots of vegetables so Terry could make the soup for the evening meal...no small thing i can tell you, but between the 3 of us, Richard,Terry and myself we got it done. I was treated to lots of love and hugs and caring - so it was just fine. they spent most of the time away from the house attending the retreat, only at meal times did they all take over the living room. but again, it had it's positive side....lots of good food and some well needed distraction.

so now, here i am at just over a week after surgery and i am doing so much better. walking with the aid of my walker up and down the living room, 3-5 times a day for 15 minutes. sitting at a table longer and longer each day. I am focusing on the small but significant advances that i have made over the past 4-5 days....some feel monumental. physiotherapy starts tomorrow and i understand they offer their own brand of torture!!!

First real snow fall here...overnight about 2" accummulated....looks very pretty out there and i am content to be sitting here at the dining room table, the wood stove keeping us cosy. Being this dependent on other folks is a whole new experience....but bit by bit i am regaining some independence.