Time to Talk About It

The news around here, is that my hubby has bladder cancer. Clinics and docs have been slow to act. After weeks and scans and tests, they scheduled the main exploration for next Monday when they'll remove bits of tissue to examine, and we'll still have until after Thanksgiving to learn the extent of things.
Eric is quietly reading, searching, contemplating, planning, and sharing. He doesn't feel very well, but is marching along, keeping way too busy.
For me, it's been shock, surprise, not such a surprise, dread, an interruption to every part of our days and lives, anger, and questions, lots of questions. It's the unanswered questions that kept me from telling people. I've been irritated and loath to repeatedly say, “I do't know. We don't know. I'm wondering the same thing.”
But, after being reminded by the doc, in a scheduled phone call this morning, that it's going to be another two weeks before we know any gory details, I suddenly - what, came to terms with it? At any rate, it suddenly changed for me. I've shared the news and seem to be settling into this next phase.
We'll muddle along as we do, though perhaps not as beautifully as these autumn leaves, that please and reassure, somehow, as they continue to be just what they have to be.