Nothing to say really...

Today has been one of the hardest days I can remember for a long time. We picked up Toby a week ago and he's had a few issues that we could have worked through like lead aggression and the fact that we couldn't cuddle anyone at home without him jumping in (still not sure if it was a possessive thing or a jealousy thing) but last night and the night before he snapped at my wife and me, her on Thursday and me on Friday then when he was scolded he began baring his teeth and growling. This would go on for about 15 minutes and any approach would result in more growling and teeth baring. Eventually he would give in and come over with his tail between his legs
The other stuff we could have worked together with and dealt with over time but the aggression is something I couldn't risk happening to my daughters. They're too young to have the trauma of a dog bite and I would never ever forgive myself if anything happened to them or my wife.

So today I took Toby back to the rescue centre and I cried as I handed him back. I couldn't believe the effect it had on me.. 45 years old and here I was crying in front of a stranger over a dog I'd known for a week. I feel like such a failure for having let Toby down like this. He's such an incredible dog and he deserves all the love that someone can give. If I didnt have the kids and I could choose any dog I'd take him 100 times out of 100.

This isn't a "let's all feel sympathy for beardy" type post.. it's simply an outlet where I can voice my thoughts that I can't at home because I'll just upset everyone all over again. When my wife and I made the decision to return him we know it was the right thing to do but it genuinely hurt like hell. Even when Toby and i were driving back to the centre I had to stop myself from just turning the car around.. I even stopped halfway there and sat for a while trying to decide what to do.

I know in my head that it was the right thing to do.. my kids are my first priority always but why now do I feel like such a complete dick?

Apologies to anyone reading that made it to the end of this. Believe me, it surprised me as much as anyone how quickly he became part of the family and how hard it would be to let him go...